“Everything is Empty”

Then: “Everything is empty”

Now: “Everything is full”

Years ago I wrote "everything is empty" in a notebook. It exactly captures what living used to feel like.

What does living feel like now? "Everything is full" is a pretty good description.

Not full in the sense of simple, clear, and happy. More like simple and complex, clear and muddy, happy and sad. All of it.

Interesting that "empty" is simple. I think I got to that empty, simple place by reducing the complex, muddy, and sad parts of life to something that seemed manageable, and with each reduced step I unknowingly moved closer and closer to empty. Until I was there in all the empty lifeless life that I was living.

I was unwell. Therapy helped but I was still stuck. Then I worked on something surprising, something I was afraid of: my body. I didn’t even like the word body. But it was through my body that I returned to life from empty land. Full-blown life and aliveness. Amazing, really.